by Penny Angeles-Tan | Aug 25, 2023 | Ponderings
The weirdest thoughts pop into my head when I am cooking, and this time, it was this … the first man I have ever loved is Superman.
I must have been 8 or 9 years old when Superman (the movie) first appeared starring Christopher Reeve, and I remember my prepubescent heart racing as I gazed into those beautiful blue eyes.
Christopher Reeve in Superman (1978)
I didn’t understand my feelings, but from not giving a damn about any actor, I was suddenly following his career and on tenterhooks for his new movies, especially any new Superman movie. He was Superman for almost ten years, and my love never waned.
I recall being devastated and crying in my room when I heard about his passing years later.
It’s Clark Kent, not Superman.
Dean Cain as Clark Kent in Lois and Clark (1993 to 1997)
Years later, in 1993, Dean Cain appeared in the TV series Lois and Clark, and I was like, “Meh, he’s not Superman,” even though he technically was. Even the title tells us he was Clark Kent more than Superman on the screen.
I watched and enjoyed it but wasn’t attracted or attached to him.
Now that I think about it, Terry Hatcher, as Lois, made a bigger impact on me since she portrayed the role akin to Margot Kidder, the original Lois Lane, but she was much prettier, so my mind could accept Clark falling for her so quickly.
Tom Welling as Clark Kent (2001 to 2011)
Then Tom Welling (born April 26, 1977) took a turn as Clark Kent in Smallville.
Yup, I said Clark Kent. The concept of Smallville didn’t allow for him to don the cape and tights, so while he often displayed his superpowers discreetly as they manifested one by one, most of the time, he was just mild-mannered Clark Kent.
What really got me keen on Smallville was Clark’s relationship with Lex Luthor. I thought that was an interesting twist to explaining how and why Lex will grow to hate Superman so much.
I found Tom more relatable between Tom and Dean, probably because he looked closer to my age. I just did a Google search, and sigh he is seven years younger.
Tom is cute, and I loved Smallville, the show, but I had no emotional investment in Tom. By the way, loved him as Cain in Lucifer.
Superman Returns
Brandon Routh as Superman in Superman Returns (2006)
And then in 2006, Brandon Routh (born October 9, 1979), and my heart dropped … immediately followed by my panties, hahaha. He just has that sweet boy next door charm and “a body made for sin.” Although he did not get the same success as Christopher Reeve, I still think he did an excellent job. In addition … hubba hubba!
I would get super happy catching him in movies like Scott Pilgrim. His role there was so different, too! Later, I was doing the Dance of Joy when I found out he was to join the cast of Legends of Tomorrow after appearing multiple times in Arrow.
So you can just imagine my joy when he got to don the cape and tights again in the DC multiverse episodes! Woo hoo!
The Man of Steel
Henry Cavill plays Superman in several DC superhero movies from 2013 to 2023
This man … whoo, lordy! Henry Cavill (born May 5, 1983) combines my old-time infatuation with Christopher Reeve with my more primal feelings for Brandon Routh.
Because of social media, I know that this man is my idea of perfect! He is both naughty and nice; he is nerdy and a gadget freak, and … he has a body I’d like to do things to that I cannot write about here to keep my rating PG-13, lol!
I watch his movies and TV shows, follow him on social media, and watch his reels. You’d think I’d be obsessed, but I haven’t downloaded his photos (except for that one on the right for this post) or his videos. I don’t buy merch and have not tried to reach out to him on any of his socials.
Just the thought of the possibility of having the chance to meet him someday makes me forget to breathe. It’s a pipedream, I know.
Daddy Superman
Tyler Hoechlin as Superman in the TV series Superman and Lois (2016 to ____ )
I love that we finally see Superman as a parent, as portrayed by Tyler Hoechlin (born September 11, 1987).
I always thought it would have to happen eventually … that we should get the opportunity to see him and Lois finally married and with kids. This changed my feelings for Superman; I now see him as a family man. I like it.
However, I must confess that I found Tyler gorgeous in 2011 when he played Derek Hale in Teen Wolf.
Watching him as Clark and trying to balance his responsibilities as Superman with being a husband and father was surreal. It made me stop and remember that heroes are people, too. While they are saving us, they have families back home who are worried about them, missing them, and hoping they come home alive and safe.
Because Tyler’s role is very paternal, I relate to him more as one parent to another. I still think he is hot, but I respect his relationship with Lois, so a part of me is stepping back and thinking, “I am not going to be a homewrecker,” which is silly, I know, since it is all fictional.
The Perfect Man
Superman, to me, is the perfect man. If I had the power to craft or choose the man I would be with for the rest of my life, it would be him … yes, a fictional character. Let’s face it: What are the odds of a man like that falling for a woman like me (at my age)?
Superman
The actors that play Superman get younger and younger; soon, he will be young enough to be my son. So, leave me to my fantasies where all my book boyfriends look like Superman.
by Penny Angeles-Tan | Jan 1, 2023 | Ponderings
I woke up to a new day and realized … it’s 2023 is here and a new year!
A new year means an opportunity to start things fresh. It means a chance to shed all the baggage of 2022 and begin the year with excitement and eagerness. I means making a list of achievable goals and building on them.
Happy new year, everyone!
by Penny Angeles-Tan | Feb 2, 2022 | Ponderings
At a very young age, I formed a strong and healthy attachment to books. I cannot recall if our parents ever read stories to us, but I clearly recall the many times growing up when every single one of us in the family would be gathered in the living room, either lying down on the couch, curled up in a chair, sprawled on the floor — each with a book in hand and reading TOGETHER. Oftentimes, we would come up for air to share something interesting or funny that we read and everyone would put down their book to listen and comment. It was wonderful. Eventually, we would rotate books and everyone would get to relate.
While we read all types of books, both fictional and non-fictional, in general, we preferred reading fictional works. I remember when mom and dad gave us a whole set of Nancy Drew books. I don’t recall my exact age, but I would guess it was at around 10 years old. My sisters and I were so happy! It was the best Christmas gift ever! As we got older our parents allowed us to read different genres of books, much as TV shows and movies are screened for a specific audience today.
With my life being as hectic as it has been for the last couple of years, I haven’t had the chance to indulge myself in quite some time, until recently when circumstances have forced me to slow down and I finally thought about picking up a book instead of watching TV or playing online.
Books come in all forms … paperback, hardcover, electronic (digital), and we are into them ALL! Lately, I’ve found myself spending a lot of time on my tablet or on the iPad mini reading stories on Good Novel, on Amazon Kindle, on iBooks, or on Moonreader. Good Novel, specifically, has taken a lot of my money 😆 when I find myself caught up in a story with no bonus coins available to continue reading.
In the coming days or weeks, I will start posting my reviews of some of the stories I have read recently and the new authors I have come to love. 💖
by Penny Angeles-Tan | Jan 8, 2021 | Ponderings
Anyone who knows me will tell you I am not a religious person. I don’t do Bible studies or prayer meetings but I don’t shun them either.
But growing up Catholic, attending a Catholic school all my life, being part of a church choir, and our family being part of Worldwide Marriage Encounter means being told from the beginning how much God is a part of our life and how much He loves us.
Sometimes I forget and wallow in doubt and self-pity and at times I feel helpless and alone in a house filled with furbabies and people and I start to question my worth.
I wrack my brain, chat with my sisters or mom, and search online for answers or solutions. I fight to keep the demons of despair away.
Later at night I curl up in a ball on my bed with the furbabies snuggled against me and I close my eyes and pray. Oftentimes, I don’t even know what to say except … “help, please”. And I try not to cry myself to sleep.
The following day I woke up resolute and determined to get back up on my feet. I go about my day and then I feel a warmth envelope me … like a hug from my dad and next thing I know my phone pings. Some projects are coming in!
All of a sudden I felt as though a burden was lifted from my chest and the first words out of my mouth were, “Thank you, God!” My fervent prayer was heard!
And immediately the song Out of the Dark by Gary Valenciano played in my head like prayer and I found myself teary-eyed and singing, my faith restored and reinforced.
by Penny Angeles-Tan | Apr 28, 2019 | Ponderings
While everyone else is enjoying their summer vacation students, faculty, and staff that are with schools that have adjusted academic calendar (such as Benilde) are braving the summer heat and going to school.
Benilde’s second term officially ended for our students on April 24th. For our faculty who were still submitting grades it ended on the 25th. For our admin staff, it ended on the 27th. In other words, no one really got to enjoy a break from school except those classes that were able to end the week before (Holy Week) or even before that.
What we are doing now?
Students are possibly:
- Still enrolling for their classes
- Adjusting their schedules
- Paying their tuition
- Attending classes
- Savouring their few days of “vacation” by skipping the first week of classes
Teachers::
- For those who have taught the subjects indicated in the load they just received, just updating their lessons and activities on BigSky (assuming they use BigSky, there are still more than a handful that resist)
- For those who are new to the subject they are contacting subject heads and asking guidance on the course (syllabus, lesson plan, lectures, supplementary materials, activities, grading sheets, etc.)
- Academic advisers are busy approving/disapproving schedules
- Meetings, meetings, meetings … per subject, per track, for full-time, per department, with the associate dean and the dean, with the vice chancellor … it really depends, I guess, on the level of involvement in school
- Part time faculty are juggling between their corporate or freelance gig and their teaching gig (or gigs)
Admin staff have not yet recovered from the demands of the last term and are possibly still playing catch up. The work just never ends.
What do we wish we were doing?
There are many things we wish we doing other than going to school.
We would rather be lying down on one of these loungers in this pool, enjoying the cool water, and possibly holding a frozen margarita in one hand. Just the thought of it makes me feel (a little) fresh already.
Walking along the beach and enjoying the beauty of nature by the sea. With Boracay open for business again, it is a safe bet that many wish they were there now.
For some maybe the mountains is more their thing. The hike, the adventure, the fresh mountain air, the view.
For those who could afford it, a trip to a different country is will whet their whistle! Hong Kong, Singapore, Indonesia, Taiwan, USA, Australia, Europe … near or far, it does not matter. They just want to get far, far away.
And then there are those who just want to stay in, catch some movies, watch TV, and basically do anything they want, or nothing at all. 😀
Back to reality
At the end of the day, though, we need to face the truth, it is time to get back on that horse. We are hot-wired to resume our responsibilities no matter what the weather, the time of the year, or our inclination. It’s back to school, Benildean boys and girls, whether we are ready for it or not. 🙂
by Penny Angeles-Tan | Jun 9, 2018 | Family and Pets, Ponderings
All dogs go to heaven, that is what they say. I certainly hope it is true because the thought of our little ones not being in heaven right now would break my heart.
Mary
But I guess that correct term is “break my heart even more”. On May 30, 3 days after birth, Little Mary passed away. She waited for me to get home, allowed me to give her vitamins and a little milk, cuddled in my hand and a few minutes later, breathed her last breath.
I cried buckets. My chest hurt so much it physically felt like my heart was breaking in two. Tears rolled down my cheeks and wouldn’t stop. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t help but think that there must have been something I missed, something I failed to do that cause her to die.
I was in denial. I kept hoping that there was actually a way to revive her. I even put her in a towel and held her against my chest as I brought her to the vet all the while massaging her chest, hoping to stimulate a pulse. But when I got there Doc Allan took her from me, checked her for himself. He tried to massage her chest, check for a heartbeat, etc. He then looked at me with a sad face and said there was nothing we could do.
You see, he had seen the pups at 8am that same morning and noticed how much smaller and thinner Mary was than the other pups and he told us that we had to forcefeed about 1 ml. of milk 30 minutes to support her. It was all for naught. We tried our best but she just wasn’t strong enough.
Ylli
After Mary passed away there was one more tiny one left and we called her Ylli. She was a little stronger than Mary and because of what happened with Mary we were extra vigilant with Ylli. We took turns feeding and cuddling her. We made sure she had first dibs on Princess’ milk before letting her sibs anywhere near, just to be sure she does not starve.
At night when it gets cold she slept with me and yesterday morning she opened her eyes for the first time and (I hope) was able to see me. I was so happy! I thought, yes! This one will make it! In my mind I was even thinking “this pup we will keep”. An hour or two later her sibs also opened their eyes.
Ylli grew a little bit and was no longer skin and bones but she was still only 1/3 the size of her sibs. Doc warned me that it was possible that like the first one, she could also have a weak heart and that if she survived she would never be as strong as her siblings.
Now I am left with 3, three precious darlings – more precious to me now than they were before. These three are strong and healthy but I still can’t help but worry.
And though I truly believe that all dogs go to heaven I don’t want them to go there too soon.
Lord, allow them to live long, happy, and healthy lives here on earth. Give them the opportunity to be loved not just by me but also by the families that will adopt them.
But I guess that correct term is “break my heart even more”. On May 30, 3 days after birth, Little Mary passed away. She waited for me to get home, allowed me to give her vitamins and a little milk, cuddled in my hand and a few minutes later, breathed her last breath.
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